


Down The Dark Path

by clover71



Category: Free!
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fusion, Gore, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Minor Character Death, Tokyo Ghoul fusion whatever, What Have I Done, What Was I Thinking?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-19
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-05-27 18:17:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6294730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clover71/pseuds/clover71
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A simple act of kindness had brought a terrifying consequence to Makoto and he couldn't stop the alteration of his body and soul, leaving his friends, Haru and Rin, to worry about him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> \- FIRST... I wrote this late 2014 for the [Journey Story BigBang](http://journeystory.livejournal.com/) challenge in LiveJournal. I posted it in my LJ where it was safely hidden from possible critiques... haha. I haven't revisited this fic for more than a year. I stumbled upon this as I was organizing my folders and decided to reread and edit and post it here in AO3, throwing caution to the wind. I still have NO IDEA WHY I WROTE THIS. So forgive me.
> 
> \- SECOND... This is fused with Tokyo Ghoul and at the time I wrote it, I was still entranced with the anime (never read the manga) but I lost interest eventually so my knowledge on Tokyo Ghoul is rough around the edges. 
> 
> \- THIRD... Though the pairing is Rin/Haru or Haru/Rin, this story isn't focused on their relationship so don't expect any romantic scenes between them. It is, however, clearly emphasized that they're in a relationship. This is more about Makoto, BUT...
> 
> \- If you're a big fan of Makoto, you might not want to read this because you wouldn't like how I wrote him here. I practically turned him to Kaneki Ken, except not exactly. I may have followed the concept of Tokyo Ghoul, but I didn't follow the plot religiously. 
> 
> \- Read at your own risk. :D
> 
> * * *

.

.

.

"So Rin's all settled in?" Makoto lifted the cup up to his lips and took a sip of his tea while peering up at Haruka through his glasses. He wasn't too surprised to see the disinterest displayed on his friend's face. That was Haruka's default expression after all.

"Yeah." Haruka's eyes strayed towards the window and Makoto knew then that it wasn't a topic he was ready to discuss. 

It wasn't a secret, really. Makoto, for one, knew of Haruka and Rin's relationship, have stood witness to how his friends came to terms with their feelings for each other not too long ago. So he wasn't surprised when they decided to move in together. It was, in fact, part of the rough plans that Haruka and Rin made right after graduating high school. It wasn't a whirlwind decision. Except now they were doing it as a couple rather than just friends. 

"Does he still plan to go to Australia?" Makoto asked out of curiosity. Rin received an offer to train with an internationally renowned swimming trainer in that country. He did plan to go, even looked forward to it. But then Haruka happened and now, as far Makoto knew, Rin had been hesitating to leave. 

"I don't know." A straightforward, perfunctory response, very much like Haruka as expected. 

"Well, I'm sure he'll make the right decision." Makoto knew it was time to take a step back, not push the issue any further. Judging from how Haruka refused to meet his gaze any longer, he could tell Haruka was either close to losing his temper or finding a way to escape the conversation, most likely leave with an illogical excuse.

"Yeah," was all Haruka offered, eyes wandering around the coffee shop and stopping right where Makoto knew where the front door was just as Makoto heard the door chime tinkled.

Makoto noticed how Haruka's eyes softened, a noticeable gleam passing through those blue orbs before he heard Rin's familiar voice behind him. 

"Hey. Sorry I'm late." Rin tapped Makoto on the shoulder before claiming the seat next to Haruka. "Traffic was unbelievable. I think there was another ghoul-related incident up at Hikarigaoka Park. Vehicles are stuck at the roads surrounding the area so I had to get off the bus and walk all the way here."

Haruka's forehead creased. "Another one? Weren't there several victims found just the other day?"

The mere mention of ghouls sent chills coursing through Makoto's skin. This was one of the reasons he regretted moving to Tokyo. He should've stayed in Iwatobi, should have applied to one of the local colleges in the prefecture. As far as he knew, ghouls hadn't reached Tottori. 

The Commission of Counter Ghoul or CCG, a federal agency responsible for dealing with these creatures, claimed they have full control of the ghoul population and had been working hard to ensure that they were contained in Tokyo. Makoto doubted that were possible considering that ghouls could alter their appearances to resemble humans but he had to believe in CCG somehow. 

"I though the twentieth ward was supposed to be peaceful," Makoto muttered under his breath, the steam billowing from his hot beverage fogging his glasses. Only then did he notice his hand had stilled just as he was about to take a sip of the light amber liquid, trembling fingers curled on the cup's handle

"According to CCG director, the binge eater, as they refer to the ghoul who is believed to be claiming countless victims for the past week, possibly hailed from another ward and not from the twentieth ward," a woman's voice filled the small space of the coffee shop, prompting Makoto to raise his eyes over to the television hanging against the corner. Someone must have turned up the volume.

"We request people who reside or frequent in Nerima and nearby areas to be wary. CCG investigators will be patrolling the city but until the binge eater is caught, curfew would be set," the woman reporter continued.

"Curfew, huh? Just great." Rin scoffed. 

"Better than being careless," Haruka said, eyes never leaving the television. 

The sun was already setting when they went their separate ways, Makoto taking the long trek toward the train station. His apartment was on the other side of the district, opposite where Rin and Haruka lived. He was just a block away from the Nerima-Kasugachou station when he ran into an acquaintance from the university. 

"Yuzuki-san, on your way home?" he asked, presuming Tomo had been in the library since she was carrying a heap of books 

"I am." Tomo adjusted the books in her arms. "I'm taking the Oedo line to Toshimaen. What about you, Tachibana-kun?" 

"What a coincidence! So am I." Makoto extended both arms, saying, "Can I help you carry those? We can take the train together."

"Thanks." Tomo handed the books over and she sighed. "But they might be too heavy. I can carry half of them."

"I don't mind," Makoto said, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He noticed the books were rather old and out of curiosity, he asked, "What are these for, anyway?"

"Just some stuff I got for a reasonable price from the antique shop nearby. I like collecting old books, preferably first editions of the famous classics." Tomo walked alongside him in a leisure pace so Makoto had to slow down.

"Interesting," was all Makoto could offer. He wasn't much of a book reader, especially classic literature, so. 

Tomo seemed eager to talk about it though so Makoto had no choice but to endure a one-sided conversation during the entire train ride. It was dark by the time they got off Toshimaen station and as they were walking out, Tomo asked where he was headed. 

"Actually, the apartment building where I live is just along this road," Makoto said, pointing ahead. 

"Lucky you." Tomo breathed out exasperatedly as she reached out to take the books from Makoto's arms. "I live five blocks from here. I don't mind the distance, really. But with the ghoul and all, it's pretty scary."

Makoto felt a pang of guilt in his chest. Surely, he could manage to walk her five blocks and back without any untoward incident, couldn't he? "I'll walk with you. Besides, walking five blocks with all these books might be uncomfortable," he said, glancing down at her feet to indicate that by uncomfortable, he meant walking on those heels she was wearing.

"Oh thank you, Tachibana-kun." Tomo's lips curved into a sincere smile. Three blocks past was a construction site and Tomo said, "There's a shortcut here. A pathway for pedestrians actually, so it's safe."

The narrow street between the fenced construction site and what seemed like an abandoned building was dark with just a sliver of light coming from the lamp post about ten feet ahead and the moonbeam as their guide. 

"Tachibana-kun." Tomo stopped walking so Makoto paused as well, turning to face her.

"Yes Yukuzi-san?" There was a noticeable change in the air that made the hair at the back of Makoto's neck bristle. 

"I have a secret to tell you." Tomo has her head bent, eyes trained on the ground. "I don't live anywhere nearby," she said, her voice turning icy that Makoto could feel his blood running cold.

"What do you mean?" His instincts were already screaming at him to run, to get out of there, but Makoto found himself unable to move, his legs felt heavy as lead.

Tomo raised her eyes, no longer the brilliant green as it did earlier. Her irises were as red as blood, sclera black as a starless night sky. The dark aura surrounding her gave off a clear killing intent. "I lied. I needed to lure you here so I could devour you." There was clear malice with the way she spoke, voice sounding hollow and distant in Makoto's ears. 

Makoto felt his arms go numb, dropping the books he still held in the process. His heart hammered against his ribcage, gut tightening. He willed his legs to move and he ran, ran as fast as he could. But he could still sense her behind him, beside him, above him. Just as he was about to reach the end of the alley, she appeared before him, as if out of thin air. 

"Where are you going, Tachibana-kun? I'm not done with you. How rude," she said, shaking here head. Something crimson spouted from her back, like deformed wings. Once more, Makoto found it difficult to move. And he screamed silently, screamed in his head when she opened her mouth and dove for his neck.

Makoto felt a sharp pain shoot down his arm, could feel something warm trickling down his body. Tomo lifted her head then, snapping Makoto out of the horrified trance. It was out of desperation perhaps, but he pushed her and tried to flee. But she was on him once more, making him lose his balance and trapping him, keeping his back flat on the ground while she continued to sink her teeth on his exposed flesh, her fingers digging painfully on his abdomen. 

The last vestiges of sensation throbbing in his body dissipated and before his consciousness left him, Makoto thought he saw a shadow tower above him and Tomo.

 

*

 

Makoto could hear voices. But they sounded too far away, as if he was underwater and they were at the surface.

"He's losing a lot of blood," a man's voice said. "There's nothing more I can do. His abdominal organs are beyond repair. I have no choice but to do an emergency transplant. Get the girl over here." 

"But doctor." It was a woman who spoke this time. "Don't you need to check if they're a match? And who will sign the consent?" 

"I know what I'm doing. And we don't have time to find someone else to sign the consent. His parents are coming all the way from Tottori. It might be too late for this young man."

And they were fading. Makoto felt like he was sinking, sinking, sinking deeper into the endless abyss.

 

*

 

Haruka's fingers felt like they were made of ice that it took great effort to press the end button on his phone. He wasn't sure how long he sat there on the edge of the bed, staring off into space. It was only until he felt a hand on his shoulder, heard Rin say, "Haru, what's wrong?" that he blinked and looked up to meet his boyfriend's gaze.

"Who was that on the phone?" Rin asked when Haruka didn't speak.

"That was Makoto's father," was all Haruka managed to utter.

Rin had to prompt him again. "And?"

Haruka had to take in a deep, shaky breath, still trying to process what Makoto's dad had told him. "They… they received a call from a hospital here in Tokyo. Makoto… he's been attacked."

"What?" Rin's voice came out an octave higher, crimson eyes growing wide. "What hospital?"

 

*

 

It was dark, so dark he couldn't see a thing. He could feel the hard ground beneath him as his feet moved, pace increasing. It took a while before he realized his eyes were closed, eyelids seemed to weigh a ton that he couldn't lift them. 

No wonder it was dark, why he couldn't see. 

Where was he, he wondered.

Then he heard it. Laughter. Growing louder and louder. Something warm brushed against his cheek, like hot breath. And a woman spoke, said, "I'm going to devour you now, Tachibana-kun," before Makoto felt teeth tearing through the skin on his neck, sending scorching pain straight down his gut. Something coiled tight in his belly, making it hard for him to breath. 

His eyes sprang open as he screamed.

 

*

 

The sound of blood-chilling scream echoed across the hallway, making both Haruka and the nurse he was speaking with jump. It was when the screaming stopped that Haruka realized there was something familiar with it. 

"Makoto." Haruka took one step toward the source but a hand coiled around his forearm, stopping him.

"I'm sorry Nanase-san. But I really can't let you in unless you're immediate family," the nurse said and though she did seem apologetic, her eyes held firm resoluteness that told Haruka she couldn't be easily swayed.

"Bullshit!" Rin spat, eyes narrowed to the point he looked absolutely menacing. "We're his close friends, might as well be considered immediate family."

"Rules are rules, Matsuoka-san." The nurse met Rin's gaze head on. "I'm only following orders."

She was right. She was only doing her job.

Rin didn't seem to see her way though. "I don't give a fuck—"

"Rin." Haruka laid a hand on Rin's shoulder, hoping it was enough to calm him down. "We can come back another time. As long as we know he'll be all right. I'm okay with that." His eyes slid over to the nurse. "Can you check on him for us?"

The nurse seemed to hesitate for a moment, but acquiesced anyway. "Alright. I'll be right back." She breezed down the corridor and disappeared from sight when she entered a room somewhere in the middle. It took approximately five minutes before she reappeared and Haruka was already pacing right by the nurse station. "He's fine," the nurse said when she was close enough. "He just had a nightmare. Unfortunately, it's one of the aftermath victims suffer after being attacked. But he's recuperating well."

Haruka was tempted to ask for more details but her eyes clearly told him that was all she could disclose and that they would have to leave. He lowered his head in a slight bow, saying, "Thank you for time," then grabbed Rin's hand and led him towards the elevators.

It wasn't until they stepped out of the hospital did Rin relax, his hand slackening around Haruka's. "I can't help but worry about him."

"I worry about him, too, but…" Haruka gave Rin's hand a squeeze. "I believe he's strong enough to pull through this." How he wished it was the other way around, wished that it was Rin reassuring him instead. In spite of his words, Haruka felt rather helpless knowing there wasn't anything he could do for Makoto and he didn't want to imagine the trauma his best friend was going through. "Now, aren't you supposed to meet up with the coach who's scouting you for a training program abroad?"

Rin stilled, causing Haruka to stop walking as well. "I'm not going," Rin said, eyes trained on the ground.

Haruka wasn't too surprised to hear that but he knew it was an opportunity that Rin shouldn't be throwing away. "You're being stupid. This is what you've always wanted, isn't it? This may be your ticket to stand on the international stage."

"I just…" Rin lifted his gaze, meeting Haruka's with a stubborn determination. "I don't want to leave you here, not when the situation with ghouls going out of control and especially not after what happened to Makoto."

Haruka drew his eyebrows together in a frown. "Are you saying you don't think I could take care of myself?"

"That's not the point!" Rin said in a raised tone, his grip on Haruka's hand tightening. "I trusted Makoto could take care of himself, otherwise, I wouldn't have let him go home on his own last night but look what happened to him."

The logic in Rin's words rang true in Haruka's head. But he couldn't let Rin use the current situation as an excuse. Rin had a dream, something he'd been holding onto for six years. There was no way Haruka would let Rin give up on it. Haruka released Rin's hand and took a step back. "Then I'll go back to Iwatobi where it's safe. Me and Makoto."

Rage surfaced on Rin's face. "What about your fucking training then? I thought we'll both be aiming to make it to the national team. And your studies, what will you do about it?"

Keeping his gaze locked with Rin's was quite a feat. Haruka could feel the heat of Rin's anger, but he didn't falter even as he said, "You'll only be gone for a year at the most, right? I can continue training back home with one of the local coaches then just resume training here with Coach Kurosami when you return. And I can transfer to any local college in Tottori."

That didn't seem to appease Rin though. If anything, he looked angrier. "And you think I'd be too selfish to grab the opportunity given to me while you slow down for my sake?"

This was undoubtedly going to be a long-drawn argument and Haruka was in no mood for it, not when the situation with Makoto still left him uneasy. And he knew how persistent Rin could be so. "Do whatever you like, Rin." He turned to march down the road, not really knowing where to go. There were no telltale signs that Rin was following him and Haruka didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed. 

He didn't feel like going home yet knowing Rin would be there, might be there, and Haruka couldn't deal with his stubborn boyfriend at the moment. With a desperate need to clear his head, Haruka made his way to the place other than the pool where he felt at ease: the shrine.

When he came home, Rin was there waiting for him. "I did see Coach James," Rin said without waiting for Haruka to say a word. "He told me that the training program for the next batch of exchange students doesn't start in two months and that would be in time for the second semester He said if I would've decided sooner, I could have made it into the first batch, which started last January."

"So you'll be leaving in two months?" Saying that somehow sent a heavy feeling in Haruka's heart.

"I have two months to decide," Rin corrected, face framed with a firm resolve. If Haruka wasn't so bothered with worry over his best friend right now, he might still have reserved energy to argue but he didn't. So he just nodded and let his feet lead him to the bathroom. He was dying to soak in the bathtub.

 

*

 

For almost two weeks, Makoto stayed at the hospital recovering, both physically and mentally. His mom stayed with him while his dad had to return to Iwatobi to relieve Makoto's grandmother of Ren and Ran, knowing that the twins could be a handful. That was, of course, after his dad made certain Makoto would be fine. 

His parents tried to convince him to go home to Iwatobi, but Makoto knew he had to put a foot down if he wanted to be independent. Sure the experience could haunt him for the rest of his college life, but Makoto wasn't about to let it defeat him.

"You're not eating again?" His mom said, pushing his plate closer to him. "You haven't been eating much in the hospital either. I thought you'd get your appetite back once you're home."

"I did eat. Just a couple of bites are enough to make me full," Makoto lied. In reality, he really couldn't consume the same food he used to before… before the accident. Or at least that was what the doctor wanted him and his parents to believe. But Makoto could clearly remember what happened; could still see Tomo attacking him in his dreams. He didn't know what the doctor did to him but since he regained consciousness, he felt like an entirely different person.

When he asked the doctor about Tomo, the doctor claimed she died from the accident – that a crane from the construction site had fallen on her back – but he refused to divulge any more details. Makoto didn't bother pushing. He was too busy trying to figure out what was happening to him, anyway.

It was when he was finally allowed to eat that Makoto became even more confused. They often served him steamed fish and steamed vegetables. Somehow, he did expect those to taste bland since they were hospital food after all. What he didn't anticipate was that every bite made him want to puke. 

When he was released and was back in his apartment, the first thing he did was take a large bite of the burger steak his mom had prepared for him, only to spit it out because it tasted like mud. He told his mom he had a tummy ache so he wouldn't hurt her feelings. It was incredibly odd because he was certain his mom's cooking wouldn't taste as awful.

What was happening to him? Something was definitely happening to him.

"Haru came by again today," his mom said while washing the dishes. "I just don't see why you refuse to see him. He's worried about you, you know. Rin, too."

"I…" Makoto wasn't sure if he was ready to face either Rin or Haruka just yet. Not when he hadn't been able to figure out why he felt like he was morphing into someone he wasn't – or more like someone he shouldn't be. "I'll call him later," he said, just so his mom would drop the subject.

Except. Makoto didn't call Haruka. 

Another week passed. 

His mom had to return to Iwatobi. Ran was sick so she had no choice, although she was pretty much reluctant to leave Makoto behind. 

It wasn't another three days until Rin came pounding at his door and Makoto knew that if he didn't answer, Rin would no doubt break it down and force his way in. So Makoto opened it, just enough for Rin to see him.

"You look like shit," Rin said, his tone lacking the usual bite that could suggest he was truly pissed. "I know you went through hell and back, but is that reason enough for you to push us away?"

Guilt clawed in his chest and Makoto couldn't help but cringe at Rin's words. "Sorry," he said and though he was sincerely contrite and regretful, his tone sounded otherwise. 

Rin stared at him with a raised eyebrow, as if he was studying him. Then he sighed and ran a hand through his burgundy locks. "At least I know you're still alive. Are you feeling okay though?"

Makoto wanted to tell Rin he was fine, that he had completely recovered, anything to get Rin off his back, but then he knew Rin might be able to see through him. "I'm… I'm still getting used to the transplant, still couldn't eat much, but a little more rest and I'm sure I'll be back to normal." _Normal, huh?_ Right.

"That's good, then." Rin shoved a white plastic bag against his chest. "It's from Haru. Don't worry, it's not mackerel. He cooked too much pork curry earlier. There are some crab croquettes and stir-fry veggies there as well. He said you might need them to get your strength back." 

Makoto took the bag, said, "Thanks, Rin. And tell Haru, thanks. I'll call you guys as soon as I feel strong enough to go out," without meeting Rin's eyes.

"You better," were Rin's last words before finally leaving Makoto to wallow in self-inflicted anxiety once more.

 

*

 

"Well?" was what greeted Rin the moment he stepped into the apartment he shared with Haruka. From the looks of it, it was obvious that Haruka had been pacing around the small space they called living room. 

"He looks really bad, like he's still recovering. He didn't let me in and I didn't push it," Rin said, taking his jacket off and throwing it at the back of the sofa before taking a seat. "He clearly didn't want me there and it seemed pointless to hang around longer than I did. But he looked fine, in spite of the dark circles under his eyes and the fact he looked like he hadn't taken a bath for weeks. Give him another week and I'm sure he'll be out and about."

It turned out Rin was right, though it didn't take a whole week. In fact it was only two days after he paid Makoto a visit that they saw him walking along the district where his university was. 

Though Haruka appeared impassive, Rin knew he was more than glad to see Makoto. "Are you back in school?" Haruka asked in an awkward manner and it took all of Rin's power not to roll his eyes on Haruka's inability to express sentiments. 

"Yeah." The smile that slid on Makoto's lips seemed feigned but Rin chose to let it be. Rin wasn't used to hearing clipped responses from Makoto either, but he presumed that Makoto could still be suffering from trauma. 

"Rin and I are going to the sushi house for dinner. Do you want to join us?" There was a hint of desperation in Haruka's voice. He missed Makoto, no doubt about it.

Normally, Makoto would accept the invitation without question but he declined, saying, "I uh… I have to see some of my classmates. There are a lot I need to catch up with school and all. Maybe some other time?"

There was a pregnant pause and Haruka looked like he wanted to insist but then his shoulders dropped. "Okay. Next time then."

 

*

 

Makoto hurried off down the street, hoping to keep a good distance from Rin and Haruka. Brooding in his apartment wasn't helping him get back on his feet so he decided to return to school, glad that none of his classmates probed him about what happened. They did ask where he'd been though and they had accepted his story that he'd been sick and had surgery. 

What he didn't anticipate was that he'd run into Haruka and Rin. He was relieved that it didn't take too much of an effort to escape them. But he felt guilty as soon as hopped into the bus. 

Whatever.

Makoto sank into the back seat where there were less people, but after two stops, the bus was nearly full. There was a scent in the air that sent his blood rushing through his veins, an aroma that made his mouth water and his stomach growl.

His skin burned, his sense of smell growing stronger. _Flesh. Blood. Flesh, blood, flesh,_ were the thoughts that swirled in his head. 

Upon realizing what he was craving for, Makoto sprang from his seat, making all heads turn. It was a good thing the bus stopped not a minute later and he got off in a rush, heading straight into a dark alley. 

Memories from _that night_ came flooding into his mind and he could feel every inch of him, every bone in his body tremble. 

_Flesh. Blood. Flesh, blood, flesh._ An inexplicable urge to feed on human flesh twisted in his gut, something he found difficult to resist. 

_No. It can't be. It can't be._ He was so hungry, so hungry that his whole body shivered as he picked up another scent that reminded him of his mother's cooking, of the scrumptious dishes Haruka often made, even Rin's special grilled meat. 

He was so hungry. So hungry that he stumbled twice trying to find the source of the delicious smell.

For the past two days, he'd been trying to force himself to eat, to wolf down all the food Rin had brought him. But he couldn't. He just threw up soon after swallowing.

He was trailing along the narrow path behind buildings now and when he knew he was getting closer, he picked up the pace and made a sharp turn around the corner. There at the end of the alley laid a man whose eyes were glassy. Above him was a ghoul, too preoccupied in digging into the man's flesh. 

The ghoul lifted his head, eyes dark as night with irises red as blood meeting Makoto's. "Oh," the ghoul said. "Did you come here to feed as well?"

 _Feed?_ No, he couldn't possibly have. But looking at the piece of human flesh that the ghoul was offering made something unfurl in his belly, something that urged him to take it, to push it down his throat. 

"You shouldn't resist, you know." A girl who might be his age walked out of the shadows that blanketed the adjacent alley. "I don't know when you last fed but you look hungry enough. Why don't you take it then?" 

When she was close enough, Makoto noticed her eyes were similar to the ghoul's. "I…" He wanted to tell her he didn't feed on humans, that he wasn't one of them but the girl stopped abruptly, a frown marring her face. 

"Why do you have only one ghoul eye?" she asked, taking another step closer. 

_What? What ghoul eye?_ Makoto caught a glimpse of a broken glass on the ground near his feet. He dreaded to peer into it, afraid of what he might see. But he did anyway and felt his whole body go numb when he saw his reflection.

 _No!_ He screamed in his head, tried to convince himself that it was just his imagination. He couldn't possibly have the same eye as the two ghouls standing before him. His left eye couldn't possibly be black as ebony with blood red iris. 

"I don't know exactly what you are, but I can't stand seeing you looking so hungry so." The girl took the piece of flesh from the other ghoul and leaped right in front of Makoto, said, "Here, eat this," and shoved it into his mouth.

His head pulsed. His heart throbbed. 

It was the most delectable thing he'd ever tasted. 

Every sensation that had been weighing him down for the past weeks seeped out of his body, leaving him feeling so much better.

 _What does this mean?_ Makoto thought staring at his own hands as if he was seeing someone else's.

 _What's happening to me?_ His heart thrummed, beating faster and faster and pumping warm blood through his veins. His knees shook, making him keel over and fall on the ground.

 _Who am I?_ He lifted his head to gaze at the two creatures before him. _Am I one of them now?_ He was no longer the same Tachibana Makoto , that was for certain.  
.  
.

(tbc)  
.  
.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- I couldn't help but cringe at my own writing while I read through this and editing was pointless so I give up.  
> \- Minor character death in this chapter but I'm sure it's a character a lot of people love so yeah, don't read if you hate the idea of anyone dying in this fandom

.  
.  
"He's not answering." Rin pulled his phone away from his ear then thumbed on the screen, probably to dial Makoto's number again. 

Haruka chucked the towel he'd been using to dry his hair at the basket. "He's probably busy with his studies. He has almost three weeks worth of schoolwork to catch up on, hasn't he?" he said in a nonchalant manner even though, like Rin, he was also worried sick over his best friend. 

"I know that but…" Rin's arm dropped at his side, phone in hand. His shoulders sagged and he looked utterly defeated, like he just lost a race. "Aren't you worried about him? This isn't like Makoto. It's obvious he'd been avoiding us."

Rin was right to be concerned because it was so unlike Makoto to keep his distance, regardless if it was deliberate or something he couldn't help. But. Haruka heaved a sigh. "Shouldn't you be worrying about yourself? You barely have a month left to decide about Australia. Or have you made your decision yet?"

Rin refused to meet his gaze. Haruka could only presume that Rin hadn't really thought it over. There wasn't any response offered and Haruka thought it best not to push it. 

Days flew by and they still hadn't heard anything from Makoto. Rin claimed he hadn't had any time to pay him a visit, but Haruka knew that was a lie. Normally, he wouldn't let anything like this bother him. Whatever was going on with Makoto, he clearly needed space and Haruka knew he had no choice but to respect that. But then again, it wasn't like Makoto to not try to contact him in any way for one straight week, so.

Makoto wasn't at his apartment. Or at least that was what Haruka concluded since Makoto wasn't answering the door, even as he kept ringing the damn doorbell for three minutes. Waiting around seemed infinitely pointless so he left. Besides, patience wasn't his strongest suit.

Haruka decided to try finding Makoto at the university. Last he heard, he was taking a part time job at the bookstore just outside the campus. But Makoto wasn't there either. Instead, Haruka ran into the person he least wanted to see: Yamazaki Sousuke.

"Nanase." Sousuke enunciated his name as if it was something vile or bitter against Sousuke's tongue. 

"Yamazaki." Haruka couldn't hold back the acerbity in his tone either. He regretted his decision of coming over to these parts. He'd forgotten that Sousuke went to the same university as Makoto. 

"I heard Rin hadn't decided whether to accept the offer to train in Australia yet," Sousuke said, eyes boring into Haruka's. 

"I don't think that's any of your business." Haruka had enough of Sousuke's meddling. Sure, he was Rin's best friend. But even Haruka leave all decision to Rin when it came to his future. What right did Sousuke have to intervene?

"I warned you once, Nanase. And I'm warning you again." Sousuke's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Don't you dare hold Rin back," he said then walked past Haruka, leaving an ominous trail in his wake. 

Haruka meant to throw another snide remark, but he spotted Makoto standing behind a lamp post ahead. Dealing with Sousuke wasn't in his priorities anyway, so Haruka hurried over to his best friend before Makoto could flee.

But Makoto stayed where he was, eyes – or more like eye – trained on Sousuke who was already a good distance away. "Is he still bothering you about Rin?" he said as soon as Haruka was close enough. 

Haruka shrugged. "He doesn't bother me." An awkward silence settled between them. Haruka stared at the eye patch covering Makoto's left eye. "What's with the patch?"

Makoto visibly jerked at that. He lifted his hand, touched the piece of fabric over his eye and said, "Side effects of the surgery, according to the doctor. My left eye is sensitive to dirt and nearly everything so I have to keep it covered."

Though reading people was more of Makoto's skill than Haruka's, it was somehow easy for Haruka to tell that Makoto was lying. But pointing it out might push Makoto further away. So Haruka chose to take it, to accept whatever Makoto said. "I see."

"I uh…" Makoto shifted his weight from one leg to the other. "I'm sorry I haven't called you or… or haven't had time to see you lately. I've been… I've been really busy."

"I understand." Haruka's instincts told him there was more to it than being busy, but again, he didn't pry.

Makoto's lips curved but the smile that took shape wasn't the one Haruka was used to seeing. "How's Rin?" 

"He's fine." Haruka wasn't fond of small talk. He preferred straightforward conversation rather than hanging around and listening to someone beat around the bush. But this was different. For some reason, he felt like he had a fragile situation in his hand and he felt rather uneasy seeing this Makoto in front of him. 

"Is he still taking that offer from Australia?" At least Makoto wasn't fleeing.

"I honestly don't know. We haven't really talked about it lately." This wasn't exactly what Haruka wanted to talk about. Rin had been clearly avoiding the topic, so Haruka had no clue what his boyfriend's plans were. 

Makoto must have read his mind like usual because he didn't press further, instead, asked, "Do you want to go for some tea?"

"Sure." Haruka debated whether to send Rin a text message to let him know where he was. But knowing Rin, he might rush over and possibly agitate Makoto so Haruka decided against it.

 

*

 

 _That Nanase_. He really had a way of getting under Sousuke's skin. Just the mere thought of how Rin was willing to throw away an amazing opportunity that could potentially make his long-time dream come true because of that guy irked Sousuke to no end.

It was the most stupid decision Rin had ever made, in Sousuke's opinion. What kind of a best friend would he be if he allowed this to happen? Without a solid plan mind, he sent Rin a text message: _Can you meet me at my place in an hour? There's something I need to discuss in person._

Before Sousuke could slip his phone back into his pocket, he heard the tone indicating he had a message. It was from Rin and it read: _Sure. I was thinking of dropping by, anyway. Haven't seen you in ages. See you an hour._

Sousuke was relieved that Rin didn't ask for any reason. 

After a quick stop at a convenience store to grab something he could prepare for dinner (a perfect excuse so Rin would have a reason to stay longer), Sousuke made his way to his apartment in haste. What he didn't expect was to find Tachibana Makoto standing by his door, clearly waiting for him. 

"Tachibana," he said, not even masking the acrimony in his tone. He had no time to deal with Makoto right now. "What do you want?"

"I was hoping we could talk. About Rin. And Haru." The stubborn resolve that defined Makoto's expression told Sousuke there was no way he could get out of this. _Might as well get it over with,_ he thought with a frown.

Without a word, he unlocked the door of his apartment and gestured for Makoto to get inside. "Five minutes. I have a lot of things to do since it's a school night.

Makoto smiled. "That would be enough."

"Then talk." Sousuke made sure his impatience was apparent as he crossed the living room, tossed the keys on the table none-too-gently, placed his groceries beside it then slid his jacket off. 

"I want you to leave them both alone, Haru especially." There was an undeniable threat in Makoto's tone, which Sousuke found rather uncharacteristic. He didn't know Makoto that well, just that he was – or seemed – friendly, optimistic and nothing like the Makoto before him, one that showed a somewhat meek antagonistic attitude.

Perhaps there was a dour side to Makoto that he hadn't witnessed yet. Sousuke never really paid him any attention back in high school since they went to different schools and he was too focused on his goal back then, too focused on Rin.

"Would you be a little more specific?" Sousuke met Makoto's narrowed eye, taking note of the black eye patch he was sporting. 

"I know you've been hounding Haru about Rin since we were still in Iwatobi." Makoto was quick to add, "And no, he didn't tell me. I just know," when Sousuke parted his lips to deflect the accusation. "I saw you earlier with Haru and I heard what you told him. Haru isn't the one forcing Rin to make decisions. And whatever Rin chooses is up to him. Just leave them alone." 

Sousuke couldn't help but snort. "Rin had a dream, still has as far as I'm aware of. And Nanase's getting in his way. As Rin's friend, I'll do everything I can to make Rin see the light, so to speak. Even if that means I'm going to have to pry Nanase away from him." He turned around, grabbed the groceries and started to make his way to the kitchen. "I think we're done here."

"No. We're not," Makoto said, voice laced with chilling menace that prompted Sousuke to face him once more.

Something heavy settled in his chest and it felt almost like his blood had been drained when he saw Makoto's face. A mask of unmistakable hostility had taken over the usual genial veneer that Makoto wore. Fear seized Sousuke, his legs unable to move so he watched helplessly as Makoto lifted the eye patch to reveal his left eye, sclera as black as the night sky and irises red as blood. Veins popped out from the corner of that eye and stretched all the way to his temple. 

"W-what are you?" Sousuke backed off slowly on impulse but before he can take another step, Makoto leaped off his feet and lunged at him, causing him to lose his balance and fall butt first on the ground.

The last thought that grazed Sousuke's mind was, _Rin would be here soon,_ before he felt solid teeth sink right where his throat is.

 

*

 

Makoto jerked awake, completely disoriented. It took a few seconds before he noticed that he was lying flat on something hard and cold. He shifted on his side, realizing that he was on the floor but what he was doing there or where he was exactly he couldn't recall. His head throbbed as he pushed himself upright.

Something that smelled like iron struck his nose, arousing him to full awareness. When his eyes strayed over to the person lying motionless a few feet from him, Makoto felt as if his heart stopped beating. 

_No. No, no, no._ He crawled over to the body, his befuddled mind gradually inferring who the man was. It was Yamazaki Sousuke. A sense of recollection hit Makoto in waves, forcing him to go through a cognitive process. Images flashed in his head. He remembered coming over to see Sousuke, to talk to him. The last thing he could recall was they were inside Sousuke's apartment and everything else was a blur.

Makoto caught sight of his reflection on the dark surface of the television across the room. It wasn't clear but he could make up the traces of blood around his mouth.

"What have I done?" he asked out loud, his voice vibrating across the silence. He lifted his hand, brushed his fingers just below his lower lip and was swept with vertigo the moment he saw the scarlet stain on his fingertips.

The sudden knock on the door startled him out of stupor. 

"Sousuke. Open up!" The voice sounded familiar and when Makoto recognized it was Rin's, his head spun with a cyclone of thoughts that rendered him paralyzed.

 

*

 

It was strange for Sousuke to not be home, not after he had called Rin over. Rin presumed he must be in the bathroom, or probably had his headphones on so he tried the knob and wasn't surprised that it turned. He made a mental note to remind Sousuke that this was Tokyo and keeping the door unlocked would be unwise.

The moment he pushed the door open, his eyes immediately landed on the two figures on the ground. He blinked to make sure it was Makoto he was seeing crouched beside—

"The fuck!" His gaze had settled on the body sprawled on the floor, throat seemed to have been torn apart, shirt soaked with blood. The shock wore off when Rin was able to identify Sousuke whose eyes were open but unseeing and with lips parted as if in a silent scream.

Then he looked at Makoto. He wondered if it was indeed Makoto because he looked different, his left eye held the color of a bloody moon in a night sky; face smeared with blood and no longer held the gentle façade that Makoto was known for. Only when he spoke, said, "R-Rin," that Rin confirmed it was indeed his friend. 

"Makoto. What happened here? S-Sousuke." Rin couldn't even string coherent words together, his legs felt weak.

"Uh—I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" Makoto made a dash past him and out the door, leaving Rin staring at Sousuke's mangled body. 

His hand trembled as he pulled his phone out. He had to call someone.

Someone.

 

*

 

The music from his phone blasted from the dining table and Haruka chose to ignore it, wanting to get dinner done before Rin got home. Rin didn't say anything about having dinner at Sousuke's place, even said he probably wouldn't stay there long. The ringing eventually stopped but it had barely been a minute and it was blasting off again.

Haruka placed the ladle on the plate and ambled over to the table to retrieve his phone, saw the name on the screen and frowned, confused.

"Nagisa?" he said once he had it pressed against his ear.

"Haru-chan! Are you okay? Is Rin-chan, okay?" Nagisa sounded frantic or anxious, which wasn't unnatural but there was something in his voice that triggered the alarm at the back of Haruka's head.

"I'm fine, Nagisa. Rin and I are both fine. Why do you ask?" Haruka had a feeling this had something to do with ghouls. Before they left Iwatobi, Nagisa was the most worried one when he learned all three of them – Makoto, Rin and himself – were transferring to Tokyo. There were reports about ghouls that had reached their hometown and Haruka didn't really think it was that big of a problem back then.

"It's all over the news. Some group of ghouls in the eleventh ward had attacked the CCG headquarters there and killed everyone. Now they're terrorizing every ward and it was just reported that they've already reached the twentieth ward where you are," Nagisa said in one breath and Haruka wondered how he managed to do that.

Haruka hadn't actually turned on the television so he was behind the news. "I haven't heard anything about that."

"Rei-chan, Gou-chan and I are worried about you guys. Ai-chan and Momo-chan, too. I've been trying to get a hold of Mako-chan but I can't contact him." Nagisa seemed like he was almost in tears.

"I just saw Makoto earlier. I'm sure he's fine." Still, Haruka couldn't help but worry. There was a niggling in his gut and he couldn't damn shake it.

"That's good to hear." It was Rei on the other end now. He must've snatched the phone from Nagisa. "But Haruka-senpai, we all think you guys should get out of there before the situation gets out of control. Maybe you can head back here in Iwatobi until things settle down?"

The sound of sirens resonating from a distance reached Haruka's ears. An unsettling feeling took up residence in his chest. "Look, Rei. I'll have to call Rin and Makoto. Rin's not home yet and it's past the time when he usually arrives."

"Now I'm really worried. Please call us once you're certain that Rin-san and Makoto-senpai are okay. And please consider coming home."

"I will, Rei. Thanks." Once the call ended, Haruka dialed Makoto's number but he was greeted with the automated response informing him that the number he was trying to reach may be out of the coverage area.

"Damn it, Makoto. Where are you?" He tried Makoto's number again. And again. On his fourth try with no luck, Haruka had the overwhelming urge to hurl his phone across the room. 

And he would have but his phone started ringing. When he saw Rin's number, he wasted no time answering the call. "Where are you?" he blurted. To hell with etiquette. He was already on edge, _Damn it!_

"Haru." The dejected way Rin spoke pushed Haruka into the deep ends of anxiety. Something was wrong. His instinct screamed warnings that something horrible had happened. "It's Sousuke." A sharp and hollow intake of breath that might have been a sob followed. "He's dead, Haru. Sousuke's gone." 

Haruka wanted to ask how or why or what the heck happened but RIn started bawling and spouting unintelligible words that might no longer be Japanese. Somewhere in Rin's rambling, Haruka thought he heard Makoto's name so he asked, "What about Makoto?" without waiting for Rin to fall silent. 

A string of disjointed phrases were spouted until Rin finally paused, perhaps to take a deep breath, then said, "He's one of them, Haru. Makoto's one of them. He's not the Makoto we know, not anymore. He's—"

As if the odds were against him, the line went dead without giving Haruka a chance to clarify what Rin meant. He listened to the irritating hiss until the last vestiges of his patience abandoned him.

Dinner would most likely be disregarded in favor of current priorities so he turned off the stove, grabbed his wallet and left their apartment.

The sirens were louder once he made it out into the streets, slicing through the still air. Few people loitered even along the commercial area which was unusual since the convenience store was usually packed with the neigborhood's residents or passers by at this hour. 

For a while, he debated where to go exactly. He was worried about Rin, wanted to be there for Rin now that his mind had completely digested the news about Sousuke's unfortunate fate. He could imagine the dilemma that his boyfriend was possibly going through. In spite of the fact that Haruka never got along well with Sousuke, he was still Rin's best friend and Haruka was somehow saddened over his untimely passing in that respect. Another reason why he had the urge to go to Rin was to find out the cause. But.

Haruka had no clue where Rin was. Presumably, he was still in Sousuke's apartment but having no interest on Sousuke at all, Haruka didn't know where he lived. He tried calling Rin but instead of the usual automated response, he kept getting a shrill noise as if there was an interference that slew the connection.

While hurrying along the street that led straight to the train station, cars that bore the CCG insignia zoomed past, prompting Haruka to revisit his conversation with Nagisa earlier. Could it be true, he wondered, that ghouls from the 11th ward had come here to invoke chaos? 

There was a reason why he and Rin agreed to stay in this area, why Makoto had likewise chosen a school within the vicinity. The 20th ward, though still populated with ghouls, was known to be the most peaceful. Rumor had it that most ghouls here operate under a faction and they followed some sort of etiquette code or whatever bullshit. Haruka had no clue what etiquette was there in devouring humans.

But still.

If this code they adhere had anything to do with keeping ghoul-related incidents in this ward minimal, then who was he to complain. But ghouls from the 11th ward might be an entirely different story. They were, as news reporters claimed, more aggressive. And if what Nagisa had told him was true then….

Haruka decided that while he was figuring out how and where to find Rin, he would head over to check on Makoto. The train ride to the station near Makoto's place seemed to have gone longer than usual. Or maybe it was only his imagination since he was restless as fuck. He willed his feet to hurry as he rushed along the pavement, Rin's words playing in his head.

 _Makoto's one of them._ What did that mean? One of who or what exactly? And why did Rin blurted it after informing him about Sousuke's death? Was there some sort of anomalous connection? A thousand questions swam in Haruka's head, too distracted that he hadn't notice he had arrived at Makoto's apartment building and was already standing outside Makoto's door. His subconscious thought must have guided him there.

He brought his fist up and knocked, gently at first but when there wasn't any response, he practically pounded on the door, yelling, "Makoto! It's me," with complete disregard to neighbors. No one seemed to give a shit though, not one was telling him off so Haruka figured it was okay and continued to rap against the wooden surface with more force than necessary. He could sense movement inside, could tell Makoto was home. 

"I know you're in there," Haruka said in a way Rin did as team captain of the Samezuka swim team back in high school – authoritative and firm. 

"You better leave, Haru," came floating through the door and Haruka could almost hear Makoto breathing. "It's not safe for you here."

"Let me in," was Haruka's stubborn response. If Makoto was so concerned for his safety, then Makoto had best allow him to take shelter in his apartment where he would be out of harm's way.

But Makoto was being stubborn, said, "I can't, Haru. Just… just go," like it pained him to utter those words and this gave Haruka the more reason to stand his ground.

"I am not leaving until you tell me what's going on? What's happening to you, Makoto?" Haruka heard nothing but silence for a while with only the cawing of crows and the discordant horns of cars from the streets to disturb the unsettling tension. There was a quiet thump and the door quivering, which suggested that Makoto may be leaning against the other side. "I've known you for years, Makoto, so I know that you've been acting out of character lately. Something's happening to you, I can tell."

More wordless seconds passed then Makoto finally spoke. "Have you talked to Rin?"

Haruka pondered whether to tell Makoto about Sousuke but it didn't take him long to decide against it. One step at a time, considering that Haruka was still in the dark about Rin's news. If Haruka were to connect the dots, he had to take the most prudent approach. "No," he lied. "I've been trying to call him but couldn't get through for some reason."

Another awkward silence followed. Then. "I'm sorry, Haru. I'm so sorry. Tell Rin, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do it, I swear. I didn't," came spilling out as if Makoto's vocabulary became limited all of a sudden. Haruka had never been so confused in his life. What was Makoto apologizing for? And why would he need to apologize to Rin? Did he have anything to do with Sousuke's death? Why and how and what the fuck? 

Haruka's head reeled and a bout of migraine was threatening to settle in. _He's not the Makoto we know, not anymore._ "What happened to you, Makoto?" His hand was splayed against the cold surface of the door. He felt helpless, such a useless friend he was, hating the fact there was this damn wall between him and Makoto that Haruka couldn't break down.

And Makoto kept pushing him away. "Just… go, Haru. Find Rin. Find Rin and get out of Tokyo while you can."

"What about you?" 

An audible release of breath echoed from inside. "I'm not the same Makoto you know, Haru. I can't travel down the same road you guys do anymore. And I need to go to where you and Rin wouldn't be able to follow," were the cryptic words Makoto offered. 

Haruka would've asked Makoto to be a little more specific and not feed him with metaphors that could be interpreted a thousand ways, would've insisted that Makoto let him in, but then his phone demanded attention and it was a call Haruka couldn't ignore. 

"Haru," Rin said without giving Haruka a chance to utter a word. "Where are you?"

"At Makoto's," was Haruka's cursory response. "And you? I've been trying to call you."

"I'm back at the apartment. There was an electronic interference in the area where Sousuke lives, CCG everywhere," Rin explained, sounding like he was close to having an anxiety attack. "Listen, Haru, you have to get out of there, now. Is Makoto with you?"

"He wouldn't open the door." Haruka glared at the wooden barrier as if that gesture alone could will it to open. 

"Don't talk to him, then. Just get out of there." 

"But—"

"No buts, Haru. I'll stay on the line with you until you're on a train back home." Rin wasn't leaving any room for argument and Haruka had a gut feeling that he shouldn't protest, that there wasn't any place for his stubborn resolve in this situation. 

"All right." Haruka leaned close to the door, afraid that if he did leave, this would be the last time he'd ever hear from Makoto. "Makoto, I have to get to Rin."

"Go, Haru." Makoto's voice had gone weak and there was something dismissive in the way he spoke. "Tell Rin I'm sorry."

Haruka's feet felt like they were made of lead, every step he took was agonizing.

 

*

 

"You did the right thing." The girl Makoto met in the alley a lifetime ago it seemed, the one who was responsible for his first taste of human flesh, walked out of the shadows. She had showed up half an hour before Haruka came pounding at his door.

"I feel like the world's worst friend, Satomi." Makoto kept his head bowed between his knees, back still against the door. The floor seemed like the most comfortable place to sit on right now so he made no move to stand.

"You'd be the worst friend if you didn't push him away. It was a necessary move for his own protection," Satomi said matter-of-factly. "We have to leave now, before any member of the 11th ward ghouls get to us. Arrangements have already been made. Come." She reached out, offering Makoto a hand.

Makoto lifted his gaze and saw she was probably his only chance right now to make something better out of this new chapter of his life. "What about my friends?"

"I told you. The boss knows someone who works for CCG. How do you think we kept them off our backs all this time?" Satomi didn't pull her hand back, still waiting for Makoto to take it. "And that investigator is already working on sending your friends back to Iwatobi. I suggest you worry about yourself. You're still in trouble for what you did to that Yamazaki guy."

Guilt came crashing on him in waves and Makoto felt like vomiting. "I lost control. I… I actually can't remember what happened."

"I understand." There was something reassuring in the way Satomi said those words, her eyes gleaming with empathy that made Makoto feel less alone than he did for the past weeks. "You'll learn control the cravings eventually. Right now, you have to make a choice, whether to move on with this newfound life, or would you rather stay here and let it all end?"

The sound of sirens pierced through the air like some forewarning. Makoto knew there wasn't any time to wallow on the past and the present if he still hoped for a future, regardless of where it would take him. He took Satomi's hand, knew then this was the end of the Tachibana Makoto who hailed from Iwatobi, that this was the birth of the new him.

"I'll go. Wherever this journey takes me, I'll fight to survive," he said, getting up on his feet. He packed in a hurry, enough to fill a large backpack, scanned his apartment one last time before following Satomi out the door. 

 

*

 

It had barely been ten minutes since Rin ended the call with his boyfriend after Haruka assured him he was on a train back to their place. Waiting was painful so Rin kept himself busy packing for the trip back home to Iwatobi. He was in the process of zipping his luggage close when Haruka came storming into the apartment, hollering, "Rin!"

"I'm in our room!" Rin called back. He was almost done with his things, glad he didn't have too many since they just moved to Tokyo at the beginning of spring, and he intend to help Haruka pack his.

"What are you doing?" Haruka eyed the couple of bags on the floor, brows furrowed in confusion. 

"We're going home. To Iwatobi. I have to bring Sousuke's remains back to his family." The thought of Sousuke dead stabbed painfully at his chest so trying not to shed a tear was a feat in itself but Rin did his best to stay calm. That wasn't the only reason they had to make this journey but he knew it was something Haruka would question the least.

"I'm sorry." There was remorse in Haruka's expression, something rarely seen other than his usual nonchalance. He crossed the room and before Rin knew it, Haruka collected him in his arms. 

The comfort Haruka offered broke him and Rin couldn't keep it bottled up anymore. The pain that had been kept twisted in his chest unfurled, allowing him to release everything he was feeling at the moment.

Sousuke was gone, his best friend stolen from him. Rin felt no shame in crying against Haruka's chest, his fingers curled around Haruka's arm and Haruka's shirt, desperately clinging onto him, afraid that he would drown if he didn't.

Only when he finally felt calm enough did Rin realize that the hour had stretched. "I'll help you pack," he said, his voice had gone hoarse. 

Haruka only nodded. Halfway through, he asked, "Why does it seem like you're emptying the apartment?"

It was difficult to meet Haruka's eyes, uncertain how he would react, so Rin kept his gaze focused on the box he was filling up with kitchen utensils. "We're not coming back here, Haru."

An audible sigh escaped Haruka. "Good. I never wanted to come here in the first place. I only did because of you and Makoto."

The mere mention of Makoto sent a chill down Rin's spine. He'd been agonizing whether to tell Haruka what he had witnessed, but he had the right to know. "About Makoto," Rin started, braving to meet Haruka's eyes. "I saw him at Sousuke's apartment." 

A frown marred Haruka's face once more. "What was he doing there?"

Rin hesitated, not wanting to sound like he was spouting senseless accusations. "At first I wasn't sure if it was him because he looked entirely different." He gestured at his face with his hand. "One of his eyes – his left eye – had a different color, the sclera's all black and the iris red, like a ghoul's eye. And he had blood on his face. I didn't know what to make of it, until he ran out of there saying he was sorry."

Haruka offered no reaction, just stared at Rin as if Rin was speaking in a different language.

"Sousuke died from a ghoul attack, Haru. And Makoto was the one I saw with him," were the phrases that Rin managed to string together carefully so Haruka would come up with his own conclusion.

"He said he was no longer the Makoto I know," Haruka muttered in almost a whisper. "He said he needs to go somewhere where you and I wouldn't be able to follow." A single tear slid out of the corner of Haruka's eye and down his cheek. "The accident. Rin, do you think…?"

This was a puzzle that was surely difficult to piece together. "I don't know, Haru. The CCG investigator who's arranging the trip back home for us mentioned a rumor about a doctor who had been conducting peculiar experiments that involved fusing a ghoul's part into a human," Rin said, recalling every detail he learned while he was at Sousuke's place dealing with the CCG people. "Makoto may have been a victim." 

Haruka sank into a chair looking like the last remnants of his energy had been sucked out of him. "Makoto."

 

*

 

It was strange to be back in Iwatobi, to be back home. It felt like he'd been away for ages while in reality, it had only been a few months. It was sadly a short journey through college. 

The funeral wasn't drawn out like he feared it would. Sousuke's family didn't want to dwell on this sudden loss. 

Rin had been coordinating with the trainer in Australia for the past two weeks since they arrived. "I sent him videos of you in competitions and I think he's interested in getting you into the same training program that I'll be taking," he said with forced enthusiasm. Haruka could tell Rin was still hurting, but he was doing his best to move on. So was he.

"Okay." One thing Haruka had learned since he started dating Rin – or even long before that – was that once Rin had set his mind on something, it would be difficult to sway him. The impromptu trip to Australia when they were in high school was proof of that. "Just don't spring a surprise on me. Let me know at least a few weeks ahead. It's hard to pack without proper planning, you know."

A smirk curved onto Rin's lips. "Of course." He climbed into the bed to join Haruka, wrapping an arm around Haruka's waist, his other hand cupping Haruka's cheek. "You can resume training there with me and we can start a new life together, see our dreams through and all."

"I just wish…" Haruka pushed the thought out of his mind. He knew hoping that Makoto could be with them was pointless. 

Few days after they had gone back to Iwatobi, Haruka received an email from Makoto bidding him farewell, thanking Haruka for the friendship and told Haruka not to look for him because he was embarking on a new journey. Difficult as it might be, but Haruka knew it was time for him to let go.

"I'm sure he's fine." Rin sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than reassuring Haruka. "Makoto is a survivor, after all."

Haruka stroke Rin's cheek with the back of his fingers. "I hope so," he said and met Rin's lips in a soft kiss. They both lost their best friends. But at least, they still had each other. 

 

 _Owari_  
.  
.


End file.
